adaptation

Today I saw Adaptation.

The 2002 movie starring Nicolas Cage. I don't particularly like Nicolas Cage, but I was really interested in the character he played in this film. Not so much because the character he was playing was interesting, no, more that the character he was playing was so... mediocre. Boring if you will. He reminds me of me.

I learned something new about myself watching this movie. I wanna know what it feels like to care about something passionately. There is a character in the movie, John Laroche, who poaches flowers. Specifically a "Ghost Orchid." An orchid so rare, and so sought after, that it's the thing of legends. Susan Orlean is interviewing Mr. Laroche and trying to understand what makes him do the things he does. The symbol of the orchid is huge for me. It's this mysterious, sought after, magical, beautiful flower. It's so rare that you would be extremely lucky to see one in your lifetime. The only problem is, Susan doesn't care about flowers. She thinks she should, because everyone else cares about this flower, and she deludes herself into thinking that seeing this flower will be some life changing experience that drives her to reach some new level of passion and emotion. But I love the part in the film where she sees the flower after a grueling hike and her reaction was, "It's just a flower." I feel like I make this same mistake myself every day. I'm always looking for some big answer. Some magnificent manifestation of raw, passionate emotion. Just like Susan, "I wanna know what it feels like to care about something passionately." Maybe that turning point in life where you gain clarity happens in a moment, maybe it doesn't. I wouldn't know.